Sunday, December 27, 2009

Thoughts from the Holiday

Lots of important events transpired before I was born - or afterward but before I was cognizant - which still impact the lives and interactions of people I know and about whom I care. 

Love makes you ache.  Love can be but is not often a happy feeling. 

My father shaved off his mustache to play Santa Claus for my cousins' kids at the family Christmas Eve party.  It was weird. 

My little brother is probably going to serve as a missionary for the LDS church.  I really cannot say, yet, what I think/how I feel about this.  I am obviously conflicted, but if it's something he truly wants to do, then I will support him. 

However, if he goes, this will be our last Christmas with everyone for two years.  The thought of that makes me pretty sad. 

Little blessings:
  • a quiet Christmas night snowfall 
  • intimate conversations with brothers and sisters
  • giving and receiving thoughtful gifts
  • cooking together
  • eating together
  • playing, laughing, living, together
  • December rain falling like a fine mist

I have been wanting to reconnect with people who knew me when I was younger, like high school classmates.  I am a lot different from the girl I was then.  I know that girl is still a part of me, but there is so much more now, too.  I think I have been failing to acknowledge her, though, in the woman I've become. And also I'm obviously interested in seeing the people others have become, as well. 

And finally, though it sounds obvious, some things really are more important than others. 

Peace be with you.  


Logan said...

My little brother is on a mission. I guess I'm only okay with it because he's in Japan, where he was previously an exchange student, and he likes Japan better than the United States.

I always tell him to just take it easy

n said...

I agree people change. The more time on this natural and lovely Earth-even with its indignations which adds zest-the more you realize how lucky;blessed we are to have even a glimpse of it. We get too caught up with particulars and forget to sense the surroundings. The people around us; how they make us feel. We get caught up with formalities and ingratitude. We forget to breath and taste;and the rhythms of life. The brightness of the sun and the steady motions of the clouds. The features only a child is aware and curious;his reality. We forget the fireflies and crickets in the dark. The moist rain and muddle mornings. The curious questions and the names. It becomes used, worn out- life. But life shouldn't be this way. Life is a leap of faith; an affirmation. That somehow you beat the odds and are here. That your carmine heart beats with tenderness. Which is what matters. We have to remember even though we change.

David L.

Anonymous said...

something you wrote here reminds me of something i once wrote here.

NAlton said...

And also with you.